Serenity laid aside her paperwork with a relieved sigh as Luna strode into her office. "Yes? Did you want to see me?"
Luna bobbed her head a little in an abbreviated bow. "I thought you might like an update on how the girls were doing." Luna tried to appear light hearted, but Serenity could see that she was tense. She settled back into her chair and closed her eyes. Great. More bad news. "All of the girls seem to be doing well in classes. Mercury is still by far the fastest, and Mars is close behind her. The other three are tying for last place" Luna looked up. "Serenity could be doing better. If she truly cared about her studies, I feel she could do well-not as well as Mercury, perhaps, but much better than her current scores." She looked down at her notes. "As for their physical training, Mars, Venus, and Jupiter are doing quite well. Their abilities all seem closely related to their parents. Both Mars and Jupiter have great skill at hand to hand combat, and while Venus is only fair to middling in that area, her leadership skills are shaping up to be nothing short of amazing. Mercury and your daughter, on the other hand, are not very strong in that area. Mercury doesn't have a combative nature-she'd much rather take a defensive stance and think her way out. Serenity is so busy trying to get along with everyone she barely fights at all. Again, I feel that if Serenity had a desire to learn to fight, she could. But she doesn't want to." Luna sighed. "And lastly we come to magic. Their magic matches their fighting skills quite well. Venus' attacks tend to be very powerful, but also very concentrated. They're good for taking out a single powerful enemy more than fighting a large group. Mars and Jupiter have powerful attacks that cause more widespread damage, and Mercury's powers lend themselves best toward concealment and defense." Luna lowered her hand and looked up from her note pad. Serenity leaned forward, eager to hear about her daughter's magical abilities. Luna spoke in a whisper. "Lastly, Serenity doesn't exhibit any signs of a magical attack."
Serenity felt tempted to clean out her ears with her fingers, but decided it wouldn't be dignified. "What?"
Luna dropped her voice even lower, a feat Serenity wouldn't have thought possible. "She hasn't used a single magical ability that I've seen. No telepathy, no teleporting, no magical attacks." Serenity's hands gripped the armrests of her chair.
No. It wasn't possible. Sol had been very powerful, almost as powerful as she. And their daughter had nothing? What would they do? She forced herself to calm down and think logically.
"It's not necessarily a cause for worry, your Majesty." For once Serenity was too busy with other concerns to object at the title. "By all accounts, the other four girls are extremely unusual in the strength and early appearance of their powers." Luna consulted her notepad again, as if it held answers for her if she stared at it hard enough. "She's improving in both her physical and mental education, now that we've got her interested, and her friendships with the other princesses are nothing less than amazing." Luna looked up into Serenity's worried eyes. "She'll be a great leader-people automatically love her, much like they do you, and while her grasp of strategy and tactics leaves much to be desired, Venus' abilities make her an excellent advisor. If they all work together, they'll be an unbeatable team, and right now the only thing that truly holds them together is your daughter, Majesty." Serenity closed her eyes and nodded, but didn't say anything. Luna waited a moment for some sort of response. When she didn't receive one she walked over to Serenity's side a placed a warm, comforting hand on her shoulder. Then, without another word, she slipped out of the room.
The second the door closed behind her Serenity hid her face in her hands. This would all be so much easier if she weren't so alone.
Serenity concentrated on not stumbling as she walked down the marble corridors toward her room. It had been a long and emotional day, and she was thankful it was finally over. She undid her hair and sighed as the full weight of it cascaded down her back. She was about to change into her nightgown when she noticed a stray shadow out on the balcony. She walked up to the glass door that opened to it and peeked out. Her daughter was on the other half of the balcony, that half that had a door that led to her room, leaning out far over the edge, staring with rapture up at the Earth. Serenity smiled and stepped out onto the balcony to settle on the railing next to the princess. She reached out and pulled her daughter back.
"Not so far, dear. I'd hate to see you lose your balance." Her daughter blinked and looked at her. "What's so interesting about the Earth, anyway?"
Little Serenity smiled with heartrending longing. "It's just so beautiful, there aren't words for it. It's a sapphire, calling to me. I can practically feel how it teems with life." She looked up at her mother. "Do we look so beautiful to them, Mom?"
Serenity tilted her head a little and thought. "I'm sure we look as striking, even though we are a lot smaller. Earth is so blue because of all the water it contains. We have water, but not in so much abundance. We probably appear very white to them, or maybe even a little lavender." She smiled down at the smooth railing, carved from the lilac stone that was most common on the Moon. "I'm sure we appear as beautiful as they do."
"But, are we in the same place in their sky all the time, like they are in ours? It doesn't rise or set like the sun and stars do."
Serenity struggled to remember the orbital mechanics of their little two planet system. She'd been so involved in petty conflicts lately that she couldn't recall some of the simplest things. "No, I don't believe so. They always see the same face of the Moon, but we see different parts of the Earth all the time, so we must rise and set in their sky." She lapsed into silence again.
Her daughter spoke up. "I'm glad they don't move in our sky. I would miss the Earth if it set. I'd rather it was up above me all the time, watching over me."
Serenity smiled at her daughter's musings, then her expression sobered. She had to broach the subject.
She took a deep breath. "Serenity, Luna came and talked to me today. She said you could do better in school and in arms practice if you would work harder at it."
Her daughter winced. "I know. She's lectured me on it too. It's just. . .I can't seem to make myself care about things like that." She gestured wildly. "What's the use of it anyway? Why in the world would I want to know how to knock the breath out of somebody, or how to aim a laser beam so it hits the target on the first shot. It's stupid. We're safe here."
Serenity didn't respond to her daughter's assumption of safety. Instead she brought up the subject that was really bothering her. "She also said that you don't have any magic abilities."
Her daughter turned to her with an angry expression on her face. "She's lying! I have magic! I'm not worthless and stupid!" She brought her hands up to her face as it began to crumple toward tears. Serenity enfolded her daughter in a hug.
"Of course you're not dear! Did Luna say that to you? I'd never think you were worthless or stupid." She leaned down and brushed her daughter's bangs off her forehead to give her a small kiss on top of the crescent moon.
Her daughter's voice came out muffled as she buried her face in her mother's hug. "No. Luna didn't say it, but I can tell everyone's thinking it. I'm a klutz, I can't understand any of my studies half as well as Mercury does, I'm always the worst in arms practice, and Luna's right! I haven't shown any sort of magic power. I'm just useless, Mom! I can't do anything right! I just know I never will, and I'll always disappoint you. . ." Her voice gave out and she began to sob in earnest. Serenity bent over her and knelt on the ground, pulling her daughter on her lap with her. She was dismayed at how large her daughter was. She'd missed so much of her little girl's childhood because of her duties. She hadn't been here for her little girl, and now look at her, consumed with the thought that she was a failure. A failure at nine. She should have been here for her-then she would know about things like this. What hurt the most was the echo of her own never-ending self doubt she heard in her daughter. She rocked Serenity and sighed.
"Shhhh. . . shhhhh. . .don't worry. Don't worry so much about it, sweetie. It'll all work out. You'll see. You'll see."
Her daughter raised her head at her words of comfort. "No it won't." She said, her wet eyes suddenly hardening.
"Of course it will, honey. I promise."
Her daughter fought her way out of her mother's grip with sudden violence and stood up. "No, it won't. That's a lie. If things would work out, Dad wouldn't have died. Nothing ever works out. Or Dad wouldn't have left. I-I never even got to see him!" Her voice rose to a shriek and broke as she turned with another sob and ran back to her room, slamming her door closed behind her.
Serenity sat there in a shocked daze as her daughter's words faded into the night mist. The shock faded into numbing grief. She looked up and the Earth shone down on her, swimming in the tears that filled her eyes.
<Oh, Sol, I miss you so much! We both miss you. . .>
She slowly pulled herself back to her feet and walked to her room.
*****
"Your Majesty! Your Majesty!"
Someone was shaking her awake. Serenity clawed her way toward the voice, finding it a welcome relief from sleep. She slowly opened her eyes. Icy hands gripped her bare shoulders and she struggled to brush them off. "Wake up, your Majesty!" She blinked her eyes open and looked around. Luna was bent over her in her nightgown, her hair hanging thick and loose down her back. When Luna saw Serenity's eyes stay open she stopped her vigorous shaking. "I'm so sorry to wake you up, Serenity. . ." There was barely restrained panic in her voice.
"Oh, that's okay," Serenity mumbled under her breath. Truth to be told, she was glad she'd been awakened. Sleep was so hard for her-her dreams still haunted her. It wasn't nightmares-nightmares she could live with. It was the happy dreams-the dreams where Sol was still alive. The dreams where he was proud of their daughter, and laughed at all their troubles. The dreams where he took her in his arms after a hard day, or swiped all her paperwork off her desk with a grin to insist they needed to go off and have a picnic. Even in her dreams Serenity knew they weren't real, and the happier her imagination struggled to make her, the more despair encroached on her sleep.
It was better to just stay awake.
Luna was holding her robe, and Serenity blinked the sleep and tears out of her eyes and obediently put her arms through the correct holes. Artemis was standing behind Luna, in a white dressing gown, and as Serenity got out of bed, pulling her robe shut and tying its belt, she noticed four little girls crowded into the doorway, turning her chamber into a rainbow of blue, green, orange and red nightgowns.
One person was missing. Serenity's eyes scanned the room, then turned to Luna. "Where's my daughter?" Luna opened her mouth, but only a strangled squeak emerged. Serenity forced her eyes to focus better on the black haired woman. "Where my daughter?" Luna's face fell into her cupped hands, and a strange sound emerged from them. Was she crying?
Artemis leaned forward and pulled Luna to his chest, allowing her to lean on him. He looked over her head at Serenity. "That's why we woke her up. Luna got up to check in on her, and she was gone."
"What?"
Luna sniffed and raised her head. "She was gone. The guards insist no one left the wing, but we've already searched it, top to bottom, twice. I didn't know what else to do, so we came in to wake you."
Serenity felt herself begin to shake. Surely she couldn't lose her daughter as well! She forced herself past her self pity, and her eyes fell on the four girls, watching everything with wide open eyes. She walked over to them and knelt in front of them. She held them with her eyes.
"Do any of you know where Serenity would go if she wanted to run away?"
At first she didn't get any reaction, but she suddenly saw Mars' eyes flicker in the direction of the balcony. She seized the little girl. "Mars! You have an idea, don't you? Tell me!"
Mars' mouth was wide open in shock. She'd probably never seen the Queen so distraught before. After a second of silence she got her voice to work. "I-I was just thinking that she's always staring up at the Earth. If she were going to run anywhere, that'd be where I'd expect her to go."
Serenity began to shake her head. "I don't' think so-"
"It's true!" Jupiter cried out. "That's what she's always doing-looking at Earth! I think that's where she'd go too."
Luna and Artemis stood next to Serenity. "No children. There's no way she could get there. The ships are all here-we checked that already. There's no way she could get to Earth."
Mercury had been looking at the ground, and now she snapped her fingers and looked up with a triumphant look on her face. She looked at the other three girls. "Do you guys remember last month when we were practicing teleporting?" Everyone nodded. "When were we able to go farthest?"
Venus opened her mouth to answer, but Artemis beat her to it. "You consistently got farthest when Serenity was with you." He paused as Mercury's eyes glinted at him in the monochrome blue light streaming from Earth. "You think she teleported there, don't you, Mercury?" She nodded earnestly.
"Everyone underestimates her," Venus said. "She may not fight as well as Mars, and she may not command as well as me, and she may not be as smart as Mercury, but-"
"Hey, what about me?" Jupiter's voice was outraged.
"And she may not cook as well as Jupiter," Venus hurriedly added.
"Thank you." Jupiter nodded with a smile as Serenity struggled to hold her annoyance in. They were only children.
" But she always ends up surprising people. Just when you think she's a hopeless case, poof ," Venus' hands flew apart in imitation of an explosion, "she surprises you." Everyone else in the room was nodding in agreement.
"But teleporting to Earth! The only one of us who could do that was Charon!" Serenity heard her own disbelief and quieted, shamed by her own dismissal of her daughter's abilities.
"It's not unheard of, and she has two powerful parents, that could both teleport. Granted, neither of you could go that far, but," Luna shrugged. "It's possible."
"But if she did go there, what are we going to do?"
"Hmm?"
Serenity rolled her eyes. "Don't any of you understand? Earth is volatile right now. Gaia's this short," She held her fingers a millimeter apart, "of being outright rude, and I send my daughter into that mess? Who knows exactly what's wrong down there. The natives could have turned violent, her people could be revolting, or she herself could have some sort of attack in mind. We have to get her out of there!"
Artemis nodded. "I understand. I'll go and try to get her back without causing a diplomatic incident, and you can keep things safe here."
Serenity shook her head. "You'll never get Gaia to listen. I have to go down and talk to her, and you both have to protect the Moon."
Luna shook her head. "I don't think that's a good ide-" Luna stopped up short. A loud crash resounded through the hallways, and everyone looked at each other in shock.
"It sounds like it came from Serenity's room." The queen barely heard Artemis' words through the ringing in her ears, but she shook off the worst of the shock and ran to her door. Everyone sprinted after her, and they all dashed down the hall, robes and nightgowns flapping against their legs. Serenity stifled a hysterical urge to laugh-they must all look like raving idiots!
Artemis reached the princess's room first and opened the door. Luna brushed past him and scooped up Serenity, who was sitting on the floor, crying. The princess buried her face in Luna's chest and clung to her like a barnacle. Serenity felt a flash of jealousy knife through her gut. It should be her that hugged her daughter at a time like this, but she knew such thoughts were unworthy of her. She'd been too busy when Serenity was younger to spend enough time with her-of course her daughter would turn to Luna for comfort.
She knelt down next to her little girl and brushed back her hair. Her dress was a mess, torn and dirtied past any hope of repair. Her hair was half undone, and her face was a mess. And she reeked of the oddest scents-as if she'd fallen into a vat of twenty different perfumes all mixed together. The princess sniffed one last time and wiped her face with the back of her hand before raising her head. "What's wrong, sweetie?" Serenity asked her daughter. "Are you hurt?"
Her daughter nodded, and Serenity noticed she was rubbing her bottom. "I judged where I was going to land wrong." She pointed to her right. "I landed on the dresser."
Serenity raised her hands to her mouth and felt a mingled reaction of anger, relief, and amusement at the sight her eyes beheld. Her daughter had appeared above the dresser, and fallen on top of it, splintering the top in half and breaking all of her different perfumes and not a few ceramic figurines. Serenity winced at the thought of all that glass her daughter had landed on and examined her daughter's back side. There were a few spots that were bloody on her legs and back, but most of the glass had been stopped by the princess's dress and petticoats. Serenity held open her arms and Luna transferred her daughter to her. She was careful not to hurt her little girl any farther as she pulled her close in a fervent hug.
"Don't ever do that to me again, do you understand?" she whispered. "You had me so afraid! I was going to go down to Earth to look for you!"
Her daughter looked up at her and tears began to appear in her eyes. "I-I'm sorry, Mother. I was just so mad, and I couldn't go anywhere to get away, so I just. . .wished."
"That's some 'wish'," someone mumbled, but Serenity was too busy with her daughter to bother finding out who. She picked her daughter up with a grunt-she was really too big to do this with-and began to walk back to her own room.
"What do you say we clean you up in my bathroom, hmm? Then, if you want, you can sleep with me tonight, and we can worry about your punishment tomorrow morning."
She felt her daughter snuggle closer, despite her mention of punishment, and smiled. She should have done this more often. "I'd rather you just told me what my punishment is now," her daughter said softly, "That way I won't stay up all night worrying about what it's going to be." All her friends began to laugh at that, but Serenity was too tired to join in or scold them. She reached her door and opened it. Her legs felt like rubber-her daughter was definitely too big to be carried anymore-and she was thankful to reach the bathroom. She put Serenity down and leaned back to see who'd entered her suite. Luna stood at the door, and Serenity caught a glimpse of Artemis bustling the girls off to bed.
"You go back to bed too, Luna. I can handle this." Luna smiled, yawned and left, closing the door softly behind her. Serenity turned back to her daughter and began to gently remove her once beautiful dress, now fit for nothing but rags. "Let's see if we can get this all off without hurting you any more, hmm?" She rocked back as her daughter crashed into her, her small arms wrapping around Serenity's neck.
"I'm sorry, Mom. I love you."
She reached up and undid the sad remains of her daughter's hairdo. "I love you too, dear.